Post by presumeddad on May 1, 2010 3:33:33 GMT -5
Here is a run down of what I am being slammed with. Any and all advice gladly accepted!!
State of Washington vs. single father
A little over eight years ago a very good friend of mine said to me the words that would soon change my life!!
He looked me in the eye and stated "You are the happiest man I have ever seen". This was during the time my spouse had decided that Meth was way more fun than family life. It was horrible. I will not begin to recapture those days. I looked at him back and replied"Ya right tell another." Then he said those words in a very Stern and assertive way.
"Then change your life Stupid!!"
It was the next day I took my children (3 boys,1 girl) and we began our journey, leaving all possessions behind. I mean all of it. We reached our new house with only one sleeping bag for furniture. It doesn't seem that long ago, my daughter was just starting the second grade and is now a freshman in high school, nearly all three boys have grown their wings. It has been a very educational journey with it's ups and downs. Lots of fun times and hard work these last years. Single parenthood is allot of work. Please do not take this the wrong way but it is at least 3 times harder being a man in this situation than a woman. There is none of the "poor guy lets feel sorry and help him out". I would in no way be facing my eviction, soon losing my drivers license, lost my job due to slandering statements from the state, had all money taken from us and be down to my last sliver of hope that we find somewhere to go had I been a Woman!
How is that you say??
Well as I said before my friend stated to change my life and make it how I wished for it to be. So I did!! and those 6-1/2 years were full of very beautiful memories we had. Then the state of Washington jumped in and decided they would make our life how they wanted it!
(Presumed fatherhood)
Washington has a law that if a married woman gives birth no matter if separated for 8 years and going through divorce that the biological father is not responsible for the child but rather the man she was separated and being divorced from shall pay all support even if he was never aware of the child. First they get all your money so you cannot afford to get an attorney.(It was two weeks before Christmas when my daughter and I were out shopping. I went to pay with my card and saw the humiliation in Megan's face as they stated the card was no good. Two weeks before Christmas they(DCS) took all the $$ out of my account Drained it dry!!Then they let me know with a nice letter how I was $17,700 behind in back child support. and proceeded to send letters to every employer I have worked for stating that I am a DEAD BEAT FATHER! I pride myself with the fact I have and still am raising 4 children as a single and very good Father. and they smack me down like that. Hard to believe but I guess it is legal for them to slander someone like that. After working for a company for 6 years, making the best money of my life I find myself unemployed. During my employment my boss was very understanding about my situation, he was okay with me having to take time off work when needed because of the kids. Then they(my company) received the letter from the state of WA. (the office personnel received the letter not the job site) stating to withhold half my money because I was a dead beat father. In turn making it seem as if I had been LYING to them for the past 6-1/2 years. No one wants to work someone that has lied to them for that long, though not true in the slightest, coming from the state agency they have their creditability to the corporate management I guess. I soon received a lay off and though there has been close by jobs there is never room. Somehow I went from a valuable employee to unemployed. They(DCS) make it hard to find work. When applying for work the company runs your name and the "He is a DeadBeat Father send us his money" comes up. You can try and try but you cannot explain that your not what they say but in fact just the opposite. So your name gets scratched and another fills the spot. Thankfully I am able to receive unemployment benefits. Though the state feels they need the money more than my family does. I am eligible for $496.00 per week of unemployment insurance. Out of that amount the state feels they are more needy than my family. So they attach it and take over 50%. Now remember they are well aware I am not the father and know who the father is! I receive $234.00 and they get $262.00. Really makes it hard when your state is more needy than you. So I figured I would apply for state assistance. Spent the whole day at the welfare office only to be informed that I make to much money for assistance. I was told that my income was calculated before they took their part of my check. Talk about double screwing someone.
I have been trying to resolve this since the first day I became aware of this. Two years now. I have a letter sent to the mother from Aurthor Curtis Prosecuting attorney dated April 8, 2008 stating that the mother needed to contact them to establish Michael Edwin Brewer as the biological father. So they knew who the father was back in 2008.( He had no job or income for them to get a hold of)
I have never seen this child nor knew about it. My now 15 year old daughter has seen her mother maybe 5 times in the last 8 years. I have been to Superior court 7 times now and each time it has been my sole responsibility to locate where the mother is (which was and still is very very hard to do) and have the court papers served on her . The respondents (my ex and her boyfriend) have not shown up to one of the hearings. Did someone say DEFAULT? not a chance. In fact, just the opposite. When they don't show it means I lose! Figure that out. At each hearing either the Judge says the previous Judge did something wrong, the papers were not served proper, or the prosecutor would find a way to have the hearing set off for another day which meant having to locate and serve the other party again even though I told the Judge there was not a chance in hell either of them would show.
Finally I saw Judge Stanke and he had signed the order for genetic testing. It is almost over!! Now I must run to the court house and set a motion for trial!! I am going to go get tested also just as a reassurance to the judge that I am not the father. You see I have been sterile for the past 15 years. Right after my daughter was born I went in and had the problem fixed:) So I am going to make sure all my soldiers are still retired:)
The trial day came and it was yet another sad day. I had seen two different lawyers for help making sure all my ducks were in a row. Neither the Lawyer from the C.L.E.A.R. program or the court facilitator had mentioned that I may need a Guardian ad litem. The Judge called my name and I approached the bench with confidence knowing I was prepared. This is simple I thought, I’m just awaiting an order of default due to the fact the respondents once again did not show for court. Then that little prosecutor makes a motion to have the trial Struck from the record. Stating I had not appointed a GAL. I had never even heard that word before, and also stated that I had not served the other party properly. This has been the third court date since the papers were originally filed and never had their been a problem with the way they were served at any other hearing. Till now .
So I went to see a lawyer again through the C.L.E.A.R. program. Received no help just stated that my case is unique and to file for a Guardian ad litem as the judge stated to do.
I now am awaiting another day in the superior court system. Curious as to what will be next.
In the mean time I must try and figure a way to try and keep a roof over my daughters head. I have tried contacting the different agency’s for a little help but for some reason either the resources are exhausted or there is no returned call. Thankfully the end of it all is drawing very very close, because my land lady(Bless her heart) can wait no longer for payment .I will not be able to call for help when they shut off the phone, or even drive my daughter to school from the box were living in because the taking of our money ($1000 per month) is not enough to satisfy the state of Washington. You see I had gotten way behind in my obligations to support a child the state of Washington had given to me without my knowledge. So they feel it necessary to suspend my driving privileges.(Ya that sure is going to help learn me a lesson.)
What angers me mostly is that I have been forced to cancel all NW AirDogs events until this all is over. I am sure you have noticed the Website is down. That is due to the fact my bank accounts have been suspended over all this. We feel thankful that we were able to host events and help out friends and organizations. We were able to donate over $3800.00 to different charities like the Children's Autism foundation and local animal shelters. I will miss that the most!!
In closing;
Although pretty much ruining my families life, I do feel thankful that my daughter and I are able to help such a struggling state with it’s financial obligations. I would like to ask for at least a Thank You from the state for all the money I have given to help them out.,
That’s not to much to ask for after all we have sacrificed everything for them.
Best regards,
Bryan Miller(presumed father)
And
Megan Miller ( innocent child paying the price)
This contact info will unfortunately not be available long but feel free to try.
Phone 360-907-xxxx
Or write to
Presumed dad
p.o. box 161
Lacenter WA
98629
State of Washington vs. single father
A little over eight years ago a very good friend of mine said to me the words that would soon change my life!!
He looked me in the eye and stated "You are the happiest man I have ever seen". This was during the time my spouse had decided that Meth was way more fun than family life. It was horrible. I will not begin to recapture those days. I looked at him back and replied"Ya right tell another." Then he said those words in a very Stern and assertive way.
"Then change your life Stupid!!"
It was the next day I took my children (3 boys,1 girl) and we began our journey, leaving all possessions behind. I mean all of it. We reached our new house with only one sleeping bag for furniture. It doesn't seem that long ago, my daughter was just starting the second grade and is now a freshman in high school, nearly all three boys have grown their wings. It has been a very educational journey with it's ups and downs. Lots of fun times and hard work these last years. Single parenthood is allot of work. Please do not take this the wrong way but it is at least 3 times harder being a man in this situation than a woman. There is none of the "poor guy lets feel sorry and help him out". I would in no way be facing my eviction, soon losing my drivers license, lost my job due to slandering statements from the state, had all money taken from us and be down to my last sliver of hope that we find somewhere to go had I been a Woman!
How is that you say??
Well as I said before my friend stated to change my life and make it how I wished for it to be. So I did!! and those 6-1/2 years were full of very beautiful memories we had. Then the state of Washington jumped in and decided they would make our life how they wanted it!
(Presumed fatherhood)
Washington has a law that if a married woman gives birth no matter if separated for 8 years and going through divorce that the biological father is not responsible for the child but rather the man she was separated and being divorced from shall pay all support even if he was never aware of the child. First they get all your money so you cannot afford to get an attorney.(It was two weeks before Christmas when my daughter and I were out shopping. I went to pay with my card and saw the humiliation in Megan's face as they stated the card was no good. Two weeks before Christmas they(DCS) took all the $$ out of my account Drained it dry!!Then they let me know with a nice letter how I was $17,700 behind in back child support. and proceeded to send letters to every employer I have worked for stating that I am a DEAD BEAT FATHER! I pride myself with the fact I have and still am raising 4 children as a single and very good Father. and they smack me down like that. Hard to believe but I guess it is legal for them to slander someone like that. After working for a company for 6 years, making the best money of my life I find myself unemployed. During my employment my boss was very understanding about my situation, he was okay with me having to take time off work when needed because of the kids. Then they(my company) received the letter from the state of WA. (the office personnel received the letter not the job site) stating to withhold half my money because I was a dead beat father. In turn making it seem as if I had been LYING to them for the past 6-1/2 years. No one wants to work someone that has lied to them for that long, though not true in the slightest, coming from the state agency they have their creditability to the corporate management I guess. I soon received a lay off and though there has been close by jobs there is never room. Somehow I went from a valuable employee to unemployed. They(DCS) make it hard to find work. When applying for work the company runs your name and the "He is a DeadBeat Father send us his money" comes up. You can try and try but you cannot explain that your not what they say but in fact just the opposite. So your name gets scratched and another fills the spot. Thankfully I am able to receive unemployment benefits. Though the state feels they need the money more than my family does. I am eligible for $496.00 per week of unemployment insurance. Out of that amount the state feels they are more needy than my family. So they attach it and take over 50%. Now remember they are well aware I am not the father and know who the father is! I receive $234.00 and they get $262.00. Really makes it hard when your state is more needy than you. So I figured I would apply for state assistance. Spent the whole day at the welfare office only to be informed that I make to much money for assistance. I was told that my income was calculated before they took their part of my check. Talk about double screwing someone.
I have been trying to resolve this since the first day I became aware of this. Two years now. I have a letter sent to the mother from Aurthor Curtis Prosecuting attorney dated April 8, 2008 stating that the mother needed to contact them to establish Michael Edwin Brewer as the biological father. So they knew who the father was back in 2008.( He had no job or income for them to get a hold of)
I have never seen this child nor knew about it. My now 15 year old daughter has seen her mother maybe 5 times in the last 8 years. I have been to Superior court 7 times now and each time it has been my sole responsibility to locate where the mother is (which was and still is very very hard to do) and have the court papers served on her . The respondents (my ex and her boyfriend) have not shown up to one of the hearings. Did someone say DEFAULT? not a chance. In fact, just the opposite. When they don't show it means I lose! Figure that out. At each hearing either the Judge says the previous Judge did something wrong, the papers were not served proper, or the prosecutor would find a way to have the hearing set off for another day which meant having to locate and serve the other party again even though I told the Judge there was not a chance in hell either of them would show.
Finally I saw Judge Stanke and he had signed the order for genetic testing. It is almost over!! Now I must run to the court house and set a motion for trial!! I am going to go get tested also just as a reassurance to the judge that I am not the father. You see I have been sterile for the past 15 years. Right after my daughter was born I went in and had the problem fixed:) So I am going to make sure all my soldiers are still retired:)
The trial day came and it was yet another sad day. I had seen two different lawyers for help making sure all my ducks were in a row. Neither the Lawyer from the C.L.E.A.R. program or the court facilitator had mentioned that I may need a Guardian ad litem. The Judge called my name and I approached the bench with confidence knowing I was prepared. This is simple I thought, I’m just awaiting an order of default due to the fact the respondents once again did not show for court. Then that little prosecutor makes a motion to have the trial Struck from the record. Stating I had not appointed a GAL. I had never even heard that word before, and also stated that I had not served the other party properly. This has been the third court date since the papers were originally filed and never had their been a problem with the way they were served at any other hearing. Till now .
So I went to see a lawyer again through the C.L.E.A.R. program. Received no help just stated that my case is unique and to file for a Guardian ad litem as the judge stated to do.
I now am awaiting another day in the superior court system. Curious as to what will be next.
In the mean time I must try and figure a way to try and keep a roof over my daughters head. I have tried contacting the different agency’s for a little help but for some reason either the resources are exhausted or there is no returned call. Thankfully the end of it all is drawing very very close, because my land lady(Bless her heart) can wait no longer for payment .I will not be able to call for help when they shut off the phone, or even drive my daughter to school from the box were living in because the taking of our money ($1000 per month) is not enough to satisfy the state of Washington. You see I had gotten way behind in my obligations to support a child the state of Washington had given to me without my knowledge. So they feel it necessary to suspend my driving privileges.(Ya that sure is going to help learn me a lesson.)
What angers me mostly is that I have been forced to cancel all NW AirDogs events until this all is over. I am sure you have noticed the Website is down. That is due to the fact my bank accounts have been suspended over all this. We feel thankful that we were able to host events and help out friends and organizations. We were able to donate over $3800.00 to different charities like the Children's Autism foundation and local animal shelters. I will miss that the most!!
In closing;
Although pretty much ruining my families life, I do feel thankful that my daughter and I are able to help such a struggling state with it’s financial obligations. I would like to ask for at least a Thank You from the state for all the money I have given to help them out.,
That’s not to much to ask for after all we have sacrificed everything for them.
Best regards,
Bryan Miller(presumed father)
And
Megan Miller ( innocent child paying the price)
This contact info will unfortunately not be available long but feel free to try.
Phone 360-907-xxxx
Or write to
Presumed dad
p.o. box 161
Lacenter WA
98629