|
|
Post by onyxrgr on Nov 5, 2010 11:50:38 GMT -5
My wife of 17 years and I recently got divorced. My ex-wife has never worked because she is severely bi- polar, so much so that she is almost schizophrenic and can barely take care of herself. I am in the military and I deploy often so I agreed to let her have custody of the kids because I never know when I will be gone although in the divorce decree we have join custody. I will be leaving the country early next year and probably will not be able to return to this country much over the next few years to visit and check on the welfare of my kids. Since our divorce two months ago she has been home with the kids only five or six days a month. She doesn’t spend any of the child support money on them but instead uses it to drink alcohol all day. My kids are all teens but I don’t think it is safe for her to leave them alone for weeks on end. Now I don’t feel comfortable leaving them with her and I want to know is there a way, without a lawyer, I can ask the court to modify custody and child support payments because of the situation the kids are in?
|
|
|
|
Post by Harrison on Nov 5, 2010 17:50:17 GMT -5
o, Time and/or timing doesn't seem to be on your side. With your divorce so recent and you agreed to her primary custody..... about the only way to change anything is to prove her unfit.
It's real easy to prove a father unfit, somebody just points a finger. A mother, you need to show a pattern of neglect, and then you'll have to be proven fit (a court battle in it's self).
A child protective service investigation runs about 90 days. You'll oc before any proof can be gathered.
Your kids are all at least teenagers and hopefully learned some commonsense from their father.
On the up side she can not use your service time against you or change anything until your back in country. I wish I had a better answer for ya. Rock meet hard place.........
|
|
|
|
Post by Harrison on Nov 6, 2010 13:08:42 GMT -5
I also wanted to caution you about CPS because they can be a real crap shoot. When investigating a woman, they either do so little, you spent more time reporting than they did investigating or you get the office ace. She believes your kids are better off going directly to a foster home and takes them. If a foster home can not be found right away they have a place for your kids, it has big block letters on it front that read "JUVINIL DETENSION CENTER". YES they will treat your kids no different than criminals and should they place your kids in a home, often they were better off with the shit parent. After all of this and you want to pull your kids out of hell and back with the love of their father be prepared for a fight. From the moment your kids are taken into custody everyone involved CPS, the court, foster home or jail, GAL and "friends of the court" are making big bucks on the kids as long as they're in the system.
As a rule these subhuman family killers will only look to place the kids with the father about 20% of the time and that's not placing that's just looking. So be VERY VERY careful if you choose to involve CPS in you kids' life. The last visit you get may be just that, your last.
I wish you were not leaving so soon cause there are steps you could take, but all this stuff with the courts and agencies take Sooo much time and move at a snails pace, unless they want to take something from you. Then the hand is quicker than the eye.
|
|
|
|
Post by onyxrgr on Nov 6, 2010 16:22:10 GMT -5
Thanks for the warning. It sounds like I have my hands full.
|
|
|
|
Post by Jim on Nov 12, 2010 12:37:03 GMT -5
Thanks for the warning. It sounds like I have my hands full. Be careful, be wise, and do not take anything for granted.... |
|
