Seeking help in washington state

[Daniel H]

well in a nut shell and to the point, a bit more than 6 months ago my ex wife decided to toss the parenting plan out of the window. I have text messages to prove this ( save everything!) she simply moved , refused to let me know where, or who with, would not let me even talk to my son on the phone, receive any school updates, medical updates ( at the time he had a broken arm from daycare), during the six months she has taken him on a few out of state trips with out my knowledge or permission.
I have been paying child support to her during all this even though i could not see my son (have receipts) i just learned that she has been advocating to the child support people that i be placed in contempt for failure to pay, so they are doing so.
I was recently able to convince the school to email me copies of his records, he has missed 28.5 days in the last six months, and his current address on file was incorrect and he should have been in another school.
I know the address because two weeks ago she all the sudden changed her tune and let me see him for a weekend, (thank god because i missed him so very much) she had invited me to stay at her house for the weekend while she went somewhere else and left me with him. when I had arrived the house was NASTY NASTY NASTY!! dishes pilled everywhere with mold growing on them and not a clean dish in the house, never been vacuumed, and just a disaster.
I took lots of pics and videos of the place while I was there but didn't tell her to clean up or anything out of fear of being cut out of his life again.
but now that I have found out about the child support ordeal and the fact she has been playing both sides like a fiddle and I am now facing jail time, I decided to fight back!
I went ahead and notified the school of his current address, I also contacted CPS and let them know of the living conditions along with the missed school days.....
Now of course I am being denied my son again by her, regardless of what the parenting plan states.
I am too poor to obtain a lawyer, I am facing jail time for child support (which I paid), and I have no idea how to start demanding in the court room for my rights as a father to be respected!!!! and enforced.
Please help.

[Jim]

May 19, 2013 1:11:19 GMT -5 @Daniel H said:

well in a nut shell and to the point, a bit more than 6 months ago my ex wife decided to toss the parenting plan out of the window. I have text messages to prove this ( save everything!) she simply moved , refused to let me know where, or who with, would not let me even talk to my son on the phone, receive any school updates, medical updates ( at the time he had a broken arm from daycare), during the six months she has taken him on a few out of state trips with out my knowledge or permission.
I have been paying child support to her during all this even though i could not see my son (have receipts) i just learned that she has been advocating to the child support people that i be placed in contempt for failure to pay, so they are doing so.
I was recently able to convince the school to email me copies of his records, he has missed 28.5 days in the last six months, and his current address on file was incorrect and he should have been in another school.
I know the address because two weeks ago she all the sudden changed her tune and let me see him for a weekend, (thank god because i missed him so very much) she had invited me to stay at her house for the weekend while she went somewhere else and left me with him. when I had arrived the house was NASTY NASTY NASTY!! dishes pilled everywhere with mold growing on them and not a clean dish in the house, never been vacuumed, and just a disaster.
I took lots of pics and videos of the place while I was there but didn't tell her to clean up or anything out of fear of being cut out of his life again.
but now that I have found out about the child support ordeal and the fact she has been playing both sides like a fiddle and I am now facing jail time, I decided to fight back!
I went ahead and notified the school of his current address, I also contacted CPS and let them know of the living conditions along with the missed school days.....
Now of course I am being denied my son again by her, regardless of what the parenting plan states.
I am too poor to obtain a lawyer, I am facing jail time for child support (which I paid), and I have no idea how to start demanding in the court room for my rights as a father to be respected!!!! and enforced.
Please help.

Sounds like you are starting to take the right steps so to speak, if you do nothing it will just get worse and you'll be totally alienated from your child.

Have you filed a contempt against her for viol;ating the parenting plan and refusing visitation etc etc etc.?

You need to go in to pro active offensive mode rather than defensive mode.

Get situated with your child support in the meanwhile but do not let her intimidate you with threats of jail etc and put things off. File a contempt, make all the payments you can possibly make to child support, they likely won't jail you if you are making an effort to catch up if you are behind. Hopefully they won't jail you.

But in the meanwhile you need to do EVERYTHING you can to not let this woman totally alienate and erase your childs father out of his life. What she is doing is basically child abuse and must be stopped.

Harrison is a moderator on this site and is in Washington State and is more familiar with procedure there than I am, perhaps he will see and respond to your post. He checks this site often and has helped many people with situations like yours.

I'll also help if I can but need to know more history and see standing orders etc.

[Harrison]

Hi Dan!!!! Jim's 100% right about staying current with the child support (CS) even though visitation and CS are two separate issues.
In WA you have to be in arrears 6 mo. or $5,000 before the state can even start any collection activities, licences suspensions, bank leans, Contempt, etc,. Our state is not real big on jailing for CS as long as there's an effort being made, but they can be real heavy handed with domestic violence (DV) charges more on that later.
Would you like custody or is visitation your goal?
What county has jurisdiction?
Where do you live? I'm in Shelton.
Do your CS payments go through the department of child support? (DCS)
At the min. your asking to file contempt charges in this state the first contempt for parental interference (PI) is a joke and seldom comes to more than a small fine and/or a scolding from the commissor/judge, but a second contempt for PI is a class C felony!!!
It sounds like you have been documenting every, if you haven't you NEED to, a date book works well and every visitation missed every move out of the school dist.
Your child missing that much school should have put him in truancy court if over the age of 8 and mom if not. This also is good for your case!
Have you contacted DCS?
There is SOOOO much info. I need to help you, please join our membership so we can use the e-mail to exchange phone numbers, e-mail address.
I can and will help it's all in the paper work and procedure and once you get the hang of it, their scare tactics will make you laugh. Oh and no there is NOT a filing fee the case is already open.
You will need a printer/scanner and a world of patients. I will be more than happy to take this in any direction you like, but be warred my bet is no matter what you do her reaction and defence will more than likely be DV allegations. DO NOT be alone with this woman, without a witness present or video running, if you can use a card to pay for your needs or at least get a receipt for everything it will be a record of your where abouts for your protection, hopefully you'll never have to use it, but from the sounds of it, don't bet on it!!! You haven't done anything yet and look what she doing......

[Harrison]

Have you been served a summons or notice of hearing for CS?

[Harrison]

If DCS requests proof of payment, you don't have to give it to them. If you do it may get them off your back for now, but her FALSE REPORTING and possible PERJURY will go unrecorded.
Most stoties I hear like this one would make me bet, Mom has a drug problem?

[Harrison]

www.courts.wa.gov/forms/documents/drpscu5_0150.doc
These are the forms related to contempt. You'll need:
1.WPF DRPSCU 05.0100 Motion/Declaration for an Order to Show Cause re Contempt (MTSC)
2. WPF DRPSCU 05.0150 Order to Show Cause re Contempt
3.WPF DRPSCU 05.0200 Order on Show Cause re Contempt/Judgment (ORCN)
Here's the law on a change of custody.
apps.leg.wa.gov/rcw/default.aspx?cite=26.09.260
For forms not on line such as the Notice of Issue (man.). See either the court facilitator or the court clerks office.
Without more info. I don't know what else you will need.

[Harrison]

court forms
www.courts.wa.gov/forms/
state law
apps.leg.wa.gov/rcw/